Idle Minds

Yes, this is the root of all evils. It seems that when we have nothing better to do, the mind sags. We start thinking and inevitably worrying too much. For a good one week after India, I practiced the art of not worrying until the time came and it was great! Must continue to work on that.

It is funny how one can be surrounded by people in a crowded room yet feel far away and alone. I felt this tonight. It was an Uncle's birthday and we went out to a huge dinner. People were there yet, I did not feel connected to anyone. It did not feel like anyone was at the same level as I was. It did not feel like anyone was interested in what I was thinking or doing. Actually, I get that a lot here. People are always wanting to talk about themselves but never about you. They do try and make the effort but it is obvious that they are waiting for you to take a breather so they can talk about themselves.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that I am not like that too. Once in awhile though, it is just nice to be able to go on and on about you and your life while someone else listens intently. Perhaps for this reason alone, people blog.

With each passing day, it gets a little bit more difficult not to slip back into the old routine of life. Miss being on the road. If at this point I was still backpacking, tomorrow would be the day a new train ticket is bought to head on to a new destination, a new adventure, a new hope of better days.

Being never satisfied presents a HUGE problem. No matter where, what, when...if you can't be satisfied then you'll never be happy, right? Screwed! Who would have thought that a quest for happiness would be so tiring and unfruitful. Even if I did learn some things in the past months, the mundane nature of everyday life just glazes over all that has been learnt. Wait a minute, this place looks too darned familiar.

Welcome back to square one.