Counseling 101

Went to counseling today and it was good. Finally spoke to one of the senior counselors and he was pretty good at what he does. We only had less than 1/2 hour today but I will go see him again tomorrow. It's difficult to open up to a complete stranger, but I guess if one's desperate enough to seek help then there is no other choice. He asked me some really tough questions today. Ones that were at the back of my head but never really made its way to the conscious part of my brain.

1) Do you still love him?
2) If he came back and said he wanted to give things another go, what would you say?
3) In order for the relationship to work, would there have to be some changes here and there, or fundamental changes?
4) Do you want to get back together?

1 and 3 were pretty easy. 2 and 4 took some thought. Did I want us to get back together? This question is assuming that we could, which is most likely not the case. But essentially my answer was that I might consider getting back together because it was comfortable. As opposed to being thrown back into the whole dating game again. If I there was someone else lined up, then no I wouldn't want to get back together with the dumper.

Walking into counseling, I knew they were not going to have answers for me. What they could do though is reflect and summarize the chaos that is my mind. Wish I could go every week. Just to spend an hour talking to someone about nothing but yourself and having them talk about you too. We should all be so privileged to be able to do that. And in some way that's why I talk to Murni so much. She seems capable of talking to you about you for hours on end. She will make a fine, fine counselor.

Something she said that was really inspirational was that people come into out lives for a reason. And when they have served the purpose of teaching us what they were supposed to, they leave. Die, move away, anything. The fundamental issue here is that people come and go throughout our lives. There is nothing we can do to keep them once the time has come.