Burnout...

is fast approaching.

Work is aging me 10X the normal speed. My choice of action today meant for a woman that she has to sleep on the streets. While it is her actions that first led us into this situation, it makes for a tough heart to not feel a little uneasy.

Today is one of those - is this really the right job for me-days.

The biggest challenge is to fight off bitterness when it spits in your face all day long. While I have to keep telling myself that people are innately good, proof of the contrary is what I see and deal with on a daily basis.

Where are my fellow freedom fighters? Where are my inspirations? Where are my allies in this fight to trust in the goodness of people?

In this time of ugliness, from where can I draw strength?

A time when the many faces of addiction, abuse, conflict, hopelessness, sadness, despair, disappointment stare me square in the eyes? When they look to me for a life line all I can do is look away. I feel their despair. I share it.

Perhaps in their lives of constant chaos, this is but another juncture of shitiness. For me who have led a sheltered life, this is jumping into a pool of gunk and not knowing how to swim in it. Not to say that anyone should be swimming in gunk. Heavens, no. Nobody deserves gunk....

The world is an ugly place - by Ana

The world is an ugly place in the slurring of my words.

The world is an ugly place in the stumbling of my foot (usually over my other one)

The world is an ugly place in my blood shot eyes.

The world is an ugly place in my shameful lies.

The world is an ugly place in the smell of my body, unwashed for weeks.

The world just got uglier, the day I live on the streets.