What is this fear?

Doing my second practicum has not been easy. Again like the first one, being the client proved to be a bit more challenging than the counsellor.

We did an exercise yesterday that really triggered me.

It had to do with identifying surface level one understanding of what people tell us, followed by a below the surface understanding. This is apparently an issue for me, yet to be dealt with.

I had a moment of catharsis and it did not feel nice. For the first time ever, I reflected and shared with a bunch of people in class my deepest, darkest fear.

Here's the exercise if you're wanting to try it.

Think of an issue that you want to talk about. Then on a piece of paper, first do the level one understanding of your issue. ie. what you tell others, yourself. This usually has an element of positive in it.

Then under that, do a below the surface understanding for yourself. No rules, no barriers...just whatever comes to mind.

It may be scary. I know it was for me. The honesty that came from me to myself...pretty much blew me away.

*sigh*

Just have to keep in mind that the more issues I deal with now, the less there is to deal with later on. Hopefully.